I watched the Oscars Sunday night, and couldn’t help but think, Detroit all over again. Like the auto industry who failed to respond to consumer demand and imports until it was too late, the film industry is struggling to respond to the changes in how people consume movies and entertainment. And yet, on Sunday night they rolled out a pageant straight out of the Bob Hope, er Borscht Belt era. It was painful to watch. Do they seriously hope this will capture the old Hollywood spirit? Why can’t they read the writing on the wall?

It’s particularly fitting, because today I wanted to write about feedback, in particular, systems of giving and receiving feedback. Much of the literature on the topic of performance management focuses on what performance metrics should be measured, how they should be measured, who should participate in it, and how it should be followed up.  There are thousands of methods and systems, and yet there is a growing consensus that the system is broken. Studies are inconclusive about its merits, whether it works, and even if it results in increased, or decreased performance. Not to mention the fact that people generally hate it. (more…)

My partner, a dog behavioral consultant, told me recently that dogs wag their tails in anticipation of something (ball, dinner, scent), but when they find it, their tails stop wagging. It proves what I call the ‘weekend phenomenon,” that the best moment of your whole weekend is Friday morning. The anticipation of something is often better than its actuality. The not-yet-realized is purer, more perfect, and thus more satisfying than the reality. The dream of the vacation is untainted by the reality of a jet-lagged layover at LAX, lost baggage, cramped hotel rooms, overpriced and mediocre restaurants, late trains and crying babies.

In fact, we love our dreams of the world so much, that the best compliment we give to reality is to say it lived up to our dreams.

There is an innate pleasure in seeking, hoping, and desiring that can be more compelling and pleasurable than attaining what we seek. Philosopher Ernst Bloch called it the Principle of Hope, the “not yet conscious”, or the anticipatory element that is so central to human thought. And now, like everything, the biological basis of this has been researched. Jaak Panksepp, an affective neuroscientist at Washington State University, has researched the ‘seeking circuits,’ showing how and why searching itself leads to addiction (clue: dopamine).

But it’s also a serious and painful process. We search for the perfect mate, and judge our partners, friends, colleagues by an illusory ideal. The blog post I envision is always so much better than what comes out on the screen. The leaders we initially get excited about always let us down. But do they let us down, or have we set the bar impossibly high? And is the answer to lower the bar? To give up on dreams? To accept that life can never be more than mediocre? Or do we keep searching, growing ever more addicted to the thrill of the chase, and never settle in any meaningful way, with the people, things, and events around us? (more…)

I’m starting to prepare my workshop on the Gold Coast of Australia in December. This year’s workshop is called The Leadership Lab. It focuses on the inner development of the leader, something I’m very interested in.  I’m fascinated by what is not included in leadership development. Conventional leadership training  usually focuses on 1) so-called soft (yet hard to master) skills such as communication, coaching, team work, 2) technical skills such as strategy, financial management, negotiation,  innovation, leading change, and 3) power, influence, and understanding one’s own leadership styles.

What’s missing though, is learning how to use your skills under pressure. The moment is not the classroom. If you don’t practice under stress, you can’t perform under stress. It’s that simple. Cops understand this, the military understands this, athletes understand this. But leadership training doesn’t always understand this. You cannot access your tools under stress unless you have trained to access your tools under stress. Arny Mindell focuses on this aspect of facilitation in what he calls “the second training.”  (more…)

Last post I talked about what makes a good learner, sharing some of what I presented at my seminar in Australia, Beyond our Grasp: The Art, Science and Flow of Learning, Performance and Change. This post deals with the challenges of giving and getting feedback and coaching others’s performance.

Having to give and get feedback is a topic that generates a lot of conversation- whether we are teachers, managers, supervisors, or coaches. A lot of the literature on feedback and performance centers around the problem of information: What information is relevant? From what sources do we gather it? How do we deliver it? And for the one receiving feedback, the same: What do I think my strengths and weaknesses are? Am I open to the feedback? But often overlooked is the conversation between the giver and receiver of feedback. Feedback is a process, not a delivery. At its best, it’s a conversation and an exploration. Let’s look at the two parts of the conversation.
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I just finished teaching a seminar in Australia, Beyond our Grasp: The Art, Science and Flow of Learning, Performance and Change. I really enjoyed working with a new topic, and having the opportunity to trial new ideas and learn together with such an enthusiastic and experienced group of participants.

We looked at the challenge of learning and outcomes: when learning is tied to an outcome, a funny thing happens. The outcome is experienced as external to ourselves. Our learning is now complicated by the presence and pressure of someone or something outside ourselves –  a teacher or program requirements, the organization’s goals, a manager, coach, or teacher, a professional association, or even a result or number. Even when the goal is self-assigned, for instance, quitting smoking or losing weight, because we are changing something about ourselves, it creates an inner conflict: one part of us against or trying to change another. Even the tiniest sense of conflict or lack of consensus with our self-interest can torpedo the whole enterprise. This is why research on workplace motivation shows conclusively that intrinsic motivation trumps external motivation, including paid incentives:

people who expect to receive a reward for completing a task or for doing that task successfully simply do not perform as well as those who expect no reward at all.

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I’m enjoying teaching an advanced symposium this semester on applying Process Work at the Process Work Institute. We’re looking at the challenges of the so-called Wanderjarhe – the post training phase of developing mastery and becoming a craftsperson. In the Medieval European tradition once the apprenticeship was completed, in order for the apprentice to become a craftsman he had to gain experience moving from one town to the other, applying his skills in different settings, and under different craftsmen. This became a very crucial part of the development of the craftsperson.

Fast forward a few centuries, and the still need remains, but the traditions have changed. Moving from mastery of (often theoretical) knowledge to mastery of craft takes a long time. In some professions the route is straightforward: you gain an entry level position and work your way up. But if people go into private practice or consulting, or become sole proprietors of a professional service business like counseling, coaching, psychotherapy, or facilitating, it’s a more circuitous route. In a way, it’s a start-up. But where a tech start up requires a big infusion of cash, starting up a business that is your own professional service requires a big infusion of, well, other things. Here are some of the things we’ve been discussing in class. These are true for anyone starting their own business, non-profit, association, or pursuing a cause. (more…)

A friend posted this great video clip of Viktor Frankl on Facebook. What an extraordinary man he was, and what a treat to see him in action.

Frankl’s analogy of learning to fly and how he learned to aim ‘north’ to arrive at his destination, reminded me of my high school yearbook quote. In the 70s, it was fashionable to put a quote underneath your photo. Most classmates had rock lyrics, like, “Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose,” but I was captivated by a line from a Robert Browning poem, “Ah, but a man’s reach must exceed his grasp, or what’s a heaven for?” (more…)

Just when we thought we couldn’t take another heated public debate, immigration reform is up next in Congress. I can only imagine the nightmare scenarios, scare tactics, fear mongering and isolationism that’s going to be bandied about. So here’s a little something to balance the debate.

I.M. Pei, Madeline Albright, Albert Einstein, John Muir, Joseph Pulitzer, Felix Franfurter, Hakeem Olajuwon, Irving Berlin, Ang Lee, Moritz Diamond, Elizabeth Mirsky

Familiar names? All made incredible contributions to this country, and all of them were immigrants. The last two you might not recognize: my paternal great grandfather who emigrated from Kiev and my maternal great grandmother who came over from Lithuania. They’re not famous, nor are they geniuses, but they certainly changed my world.

As for thinking that immigrants take jobs away from Americans, nothing could be further from the truth. Here’s something: the immigrants that comprise 12% of our population earn a staggering 47% of the nation’s science and technology PhDs and pioneer new innovations by filing for 24% of US patents.

And Vijay Govindarajan posted this last week:

Consider that the co-founder of Google is Sergey Brin, a Russian. The co-founder of Sun Microsystems is Vinod Khosla, an Indian. eBay was founded by Pierre Omidyar, who is French. The co-founder of Juniper Networks is an Indian, Pradeep Sindhu. YouTube was co-founded by Steve Chen, who is Chinese. Yahoo! was co-founded by Jerry Yang, a Chinese immigrant. Andy Grove, a Hungarian, co-founded Intel. The companies these highly skilled immigrants co-founded account for many, many jobs. There are many more such Silicon Valley startups established by immigrants, from WiChorus, founded by Rehan Jalil and acquired by Tellabs, to Hotmail, founded by Sabeer Bhatia and acquired by Microsoft.

What immigrant brought you here?

I asked my trainer and owner of Recreate Fitness, Nathan, if he would coach a “cross-fit club” with my 5^th grade boys from the I Have a Dream foundation. It’s one of my kids and leadership clubs I’ve been doing. It’s definitely been fun, but also challenging. Some of the games and activities require technique, balance, or strength. And even the most athletic kids, the ones used to winning the races and being chosen first, suddenly find themselves in the unusual position of struggling. They realize it’s hard, and not something they can just do. For kids who aren’t confident or kids who have been taught to expect praise for whatever they attempt, their first response is to get impatient and frustrated. This is a critical moment in our emotional development which has profound lingering effects. When progress isn’t immediate, when gratification or success is deferred, the difference in how we manage that moment is critical to our success in life. The well known marshmallow test shows how kids deal with delayed gratification.

So how are my boys managing this? Well, a few of them get serious and focused. A couple of them just give up after one or two attempts, and wander onto something else. Some internalize their frustration, and get upset with themselves. And others externalize their frustration. They get angry at the activity itself, me, Nathan, or whatever they deem is in their way of success. One of them, Adbul, has really gotten my attention. (more…)

There’s a lot of interesting research out there on excellence and superior performance. What accounts for superior performance? Why are some people superstars at what they do, and others just average? The question is pretty interesting, not only for what it says about excellence, but more generally, what it says about learning and development. Gladwell’s book, Outliers, is only one of several books looking at this phenomenon. The authors behind The Heart and Soul of Change: What Works in Psychotherapy, Hubble, Duncan and Miller have also been looking at superior performance in psychotherapy in their article, Supershrinks: What is the secret of their success?

As these authors and others point out, trying to account for superior performance by looking at innate talent, genius, high IQ hasn’t yielded many results. The fact is, superior performance is, in the words of Thomas Edison, one percent inspiration, ninety-nine percent perspiration. Now thatâ??s either inspiring or depressing for us average folks. Inspiring because it means excellence is available to all those willing to put in the work. And depressing because, well, hard work. Gladwell puts a figure to that hard work: 10,000 hours. It’s at 10,000 hours that people achieve true mastery. Bill Gates had 10,000 hours on a computer before starting his software business with Paul Allen. Michael Jordan spent thousands of hours in the gym, improving his performance, after he was cut from his high school basketball team. 10,000 hours of practice in one activity accounts for a virtuosity that we see as natural born talent. Or is it? (more…)