On Friday we shipped off the binders – must have been at least 10 – to the Distance Education  and Training Council offices with our application for accreditation for the Process Work Institute. It’s been a grueling couple of months. Those close to me know the gory details, as does anyone who has worked on an immense project with inhuman workloads and impossible deadlines.   It’s madness, and it brings out the best and worst of people.

So this morning, for the first time in months, I have a clear desk (sort of) and time to look ahead at my next projects, and pick up some things that have been neglected in the process (eg, my blog!). In a few weeks I’ll be in Toronto again, invited by my friends Annahid and Shakil at the Anima Leadership Institute to offer a workshop, “From Conflict to Collaboration.” And following that, I’m lucky to be the guest presenter at the Summer Leadership Institute at the University of Toronto school of Applied Science and Engineering. I’ll be presenting a workshop called “Tools and Techniques for High Performance, Cross-Disciplinary Teams.” (more…)

I was browsing through some old movies the other day and came across Love Story. Remember Love Story, Ryan O’Neal and Ali MacGraw? The line the movie made famous was Love Means Never Having to Say You’re Sorry. I was a teenager when the movie came out, and I thought that sounded pretty cool. Looking back, I think it’s ridiculous. If anything, love means having to say you’re sorry… often. Or as John Lennon said, love means having to say you’re sorry every 15 minutes. (more…)

Soft power, a term coined by Harvard University professor Joseph Nye, Jr., is widely taken as the next natural step in leadership. Soft power is the ability to lead and influence using tools of appeal: relationship, collaboration, inspiration, engagement, communication, and emotional appeal. In the November 2008 issue of HBR, Nye points to an interesting paradox about soft power women:

The United States makes it particularly difficult for women to use smart (soft) power in public life, in part because of the macho myths that dominate American culture and in part because of the climate of fear that followed September 11. Look at this year’s Democratic presidential primaries.  A woman seeking public office still has to play against the gender stereotype that women are soft. So Hillary Clinton spent a good deal of her campaign proving that she was tough and experienced. That meant that Obama was able to be the candidate who could use soft power. He could appeal to people with a message of hope, a new beginning, a new future.

To be sure, Obama was also criticized for not being tough enough. (more…)

I don’t believe leadership is best served by the parallels drawn to war and sports. It doesn’t capture the sense of service and eldership at the heart of leadership. But I do see one reason why military and sports metaphors are so often used to describe leadership challenges. War and sport have in common the need to develop mental toughness, so what you learn can be done under terrific psychological and physical stress. For an athlete, learning what to do is only part of the preparation; learning to do it on game day is another. That’s the difference between just being athletic, and being a top competitor. The professional athlete’s training includes psychological toughness by simulating game day conditions: high stakes, bad calls, mean crowds, horrible weather, and ruthless opponents. Because every athlete and coach knows that once you cross a threshold of stress, learning and thinking goes out the window. If you get triggered by stress, choking is inevitable. (more…)